Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Cry rooms, not a fan.

One of my all time favorite blogs is Catholic All Year.  Seriously, check it!  Kendra (the author of Catholic All Year) would like to fill all church cry rooms with cement so she has created a link up on this topic to gather opinions.  Since Jennifer at Conversion Diary (another all time fave. Better check it too!) is doing the 7 day 7 post challenge Kendra's link up would help knock out one of my daily posts.

Ok, let me begin with some personal experiences with cry rooms (and nurseries).
Simon almost 4 weeks old.
Back home in North Carolina, there are 3 churches that we hop around.  2 of the churches have a separate entrance for the cry room.  The alternative entrance gets many late arrivals who sometimes don't even have kids (no judging, we are guilty of being late).  So the room is often filled with lots of adults and very few kids.  The kids that were there were usually very young and most everyone followed mass.  The third cry room is more like what Kendra describes.  Lots of playing and parents talking.  I would get so agitated in that particular cry room because the volume would be turned down and I couldn't hear the mass over the conversations that were being had.  Even at that church if felt like there were more adults than children. 

Most of my experience in North Carolina was only with Owen as a baby and I had this preconceived notion that I should be in there with my babbling baby. 

We were/are stationed at Fort Drum.  We moved here when Owen was 9 months old. The on post chapel doesn't have a cry room, but it does have a nursery (or watch-care as they like to call it).  We were unaware of watch-care until the first time I attended mass without Chris, because he had duty, or training or something.  A lady informed me after mass that there was a nursery.  I remember feeling a little insecure about her approach.  I wasn't sure if she was letting me know because I looked new or if she was letting me know because she was bothered by my infant's babbles.  We later began taking Owen to watch-care.  Two babies later, Owen (4), Amelia (2), and Simon (9m) we have dropped watch-care even though all three are within the age limits to use the facility.  We choose to bring our children to mass.  Children belong at mass.  I know the nursery is not a cry room, but I think Kendra's points still apply.  The segregation of children and mass is striping them of graces that can be recieved and a foundation for their Catholic faith.

*I would like to note, that with spouses being deployed or training or extra duty it isn't always possible for families to attend mass as a whole.  Though we have been fortunate for the past year if Chris wouldn't be able to attend I would possibly put Simon in watch-care so I could have my hands free. We are still trying to establish our exception for church behavior with the older two....Then again maybe not...I really just don't know* 

I am still sorting out my vocation as a wife and mother.  I know what I want for my kids.  I just don't know how to give it to them.  I do know the best place to start is mass.  And after reading different blogs and talking to other mothers we have started implementing ways to get good behavior from our three small children.  And in less than two months we already have seen a HUGE improvement.  This past Sunday has been the best yet!

I feel that I have drifted from my opinion on cry rooms.  Back to the point!  I like the idea of cry room, but in the end it makes it very easy to become detracted to the point of not listening or even participating.  The wall literally is a spiritual barrier for some people.  Without them there would be less temptation for adults to misbehave at mass.  So I understand and agree with Kendra's sentiment and her want to fill these rooms with cement!  If cement is too much at the very least can't we just knock out the wall or break the glass? 


  1. Thanks for linking up! I love that baby picture. Hilarious. I think I need to start taking more crying baby pictures. Right now our baby books are not actually that representative of reality.

    1. Oh, thanks for reading! My husband and I thing crying baby pictures are hysterical! My kids will probably ask why were were taking pictures rather than consoling them, oops! :)

  2. Wow so proud I am bursting!! You teach me so much!

  3. Thank you so much for sharing this post Nicole! I am also not a fan of cry rooms and this is also the exact reason why. If people would just use these rooms the way it is supposed to be used, then it would be so much better for everybody. :)

  4. Thanks for reading :)